CA Trip w/family

It was a great treat to go to CA with my wife and kids! Our main reason for going was to visit my parents and brothers and it was a good visit. Here are a few of the things about the trip that stick out to me:

- People drive differently on the 405 in LA (and much of CA) than they do on I-75 in Flint.

- Our friends, the Thorntons, are in a unique situation and it is fun to watch them in it, better than TV.

- My dad is doing very well with his cancer (his oncologist called it a 'semi-miracle') and it seems to be good for everyone. He's been able to get out and about, cut back on some meds, and resume some of his painting projects.

- Our kids were pretty well-behaved, enjoyed the different cultures they entered and the different kids that they met. (Shout out to Wes, the In-n-Out Burger guy!)

- SF is so unique that it's really cool and weird at the same time.

- CA is a big state.

- Standing on the sand reminds me that the ocean is BIG and I am small.

- Much has changed in the areas where I grew up. Things I remember about those childhood days are confined to a very, very small geographical area when compared to the size of the greater Sacramento area.

This post doesn't do justice to the miles we covered and the sights we saw and the people we visited. But the best thing about the trip was being able to do it together. In one sense we do life together every single day but this was different and very enjoyable. I love my family and thank Him for allowing us to do this trip, and life, together.

Woodwork Parenting

I used to work with wood every single day. I was no craftsman but I learned what to look for and a few basic things about woodworking.

Parenting has some similiarities to that job: 1) I didn't know much when I started. 2) But I did it every day. 3) I learned along the way.

The following quote is a combo of Max Lucado's thoughts and Max quoting James Dobson. It tied parenting and woodworking together.

The key, I repeat, is sensitivity---tuning into the thoughts and feelings of our kids, listening to the clues they give us, and reacting appropriately. The sensitive heart rubs its fingers along the edges, feeling for the deep cracks . . . the snags . . . taking the time to hear . . . to care . . . to give . . . to share.

That's a good word from Max!

Christian book trivia

Prayer of Jabez - 12+ million sold
Left Behind series - 60+ million sold
Purpose-Driven Life - 40+ million sold
Your Best Life Now - 4+ million sold

I gathered these tidbits from Michael Hyatt's May 29 blog entry, 'Why Religious Book Sales Are Down'. He is the CEO of Thomas Nelson, Inc. Here is the link if you want to read the whole interesting thing: http://tinyurl.com/kqwe8o

CA Trip #2

I flew into San Jose; my brother lives in nearby Los Gatos.

Daniel is 3 years younger than me and through the years we have become good friends. We like sports. We don't like stupid stuff at church. We have the same perspective on our family.

I admire him for making a life for himself. Slugging through college. Finding a job. Relocating to a new area. Immersing himself in his work (he's a great art teacher!). Now he's looking at buying a condo (probably a good time to do so). He really has made a nice life for himself and I admire the moxy that he's shone along the way.

He's also pretty dang good with people and 'situations'. He's got a good read on why people do what they do. He's good at cutting through the bologna. He's great with strangers. He's good at mapping a plan out of the sitch. Plus, my kids like him!

I'm proud of my brother and glad he's mine!

the Max Dream

In the altered words of Martin Luther King, Jr. - "I had a dream!"

Yesterday I had a migraine. When I sense one coming on, my first strategy is to sleep it off. Many times that works for me and yesterday was not much different in that regard. I slept and when I awoke it was still there but not at full throttle. Knowing of others with much more severe migraine issues, I am glad to have something that works for me.

Anyway, as I was sleeping I had a terrible dream. I was talking with my son in his 9-year old state, but we were in a 'museum' from which he could not leave. That's because he was dead. The wounds on his head were from a golf club, some kind of iron/wedge by the looks of it. Apparently he had been killed by a violent idiot who had struck him in the head. First, a single killing blow on one side and then some blows, for effect, on the other side. And it was rather strange that we could talk while I was alive and he was dead. And he couldn't leave because he was actually on display. Apparently, the event was newsworthy in a sick tourist kind of way.

What bothered me most was the twisted ability to connect with my son but not being able to really connect with my son. No hugging. No high fives or fist bumps. No playing soccer or basketball. Just talking at odd (after business) hours. Not being able to leave together. He had to remain in his designated spot and I could only speak with him. That's such a big departure from our normal relationship that it bothers me even now as I recall those dream-world constraints. We are two physical guys. We wrestle. We smell each other (if you think that's weird you're ok, so does the rest of our family!). We play sports, tease and punch. We often 'wruggle' (a combo of wrestling and snuggling) at the end of a day.

Even though a wacky, migraine-induced dream prompted this, I'm so glad for the relationship we have. It's hard to think of it being different. Yet some day in some ways it will be that way; we will be limited in how and when we connect. [hopefully, his head won't be bashed in by a golf club.] Thank you Max for loving me even though I've got lots to learn about being a father. Thank you God for my son; thank you for our sweet relationship.

CA Trip #1

I was in CA for four days and four nights. The occassion was my dad's health, Stage 4 melanoma that has spread to his lungs.

It was good to visit my family and some old friends. One visit of note was seeing my dad's half-sister Judy; it had been 17 years. My brother and I picked her up on our way from Los Gatos to Sacramento. She's an original! But talking with her about her father (Harold. also my dad's dad.) and the whole family dynamic back then was really enlightening. I have never been one to be too curious about our family tree but this was a room that had never been opened.

Harold was quite an artist in the area of photography. He hobknobbed with respected area artists of the time and owned his own studio for awhile. His mother was a control freak and strongly disliked Judy. Whatever his relationship with my dad's mom (Regina), at some point it was completely shut down. That's why my dad was adopted by the lady known to me as Gramma Holmes. Strangely enough, Harold seemed to be a kind man and the harshness in shutting out Regina was either a dark and hidden contrast or the result of his mother's influence.
Learning about Harold gave me some insight into my father, and even myself. It is interesting how physical and character traits are passed on from one generation to the next.

Back to Aunt Judy. She and I won't agree on some moral or political issues but I appreciate some things about her. She's frank. And in a world of cover-ups and appearances that's refreshing. She's a hard worker. [several aspects of the newspaper biz, real estate agent, cattle nurse, librarian] She cares about animals like my oldest daughter does. She cares about people close to her. She really likes my dad. I don't know how things will go for her over the next 17 years but I do hope that things take a turn for the better. She's a unique lady and I like her.

miscellany

Here's a good quote from 'Christ the Only Savior of Interpretation' an article by Vern Sheridan Poythress.
"The radical nature of human depravity means that sin contaminates every aspect of human life. The hermeneutical circle simply traces ways in which such contamination operates.
In this situation, hermeneutical self-consciousness can be an instrument that we use to discover, criticize, and root out sin. But it can be so only if our own self-consciousness is purified by the work of Christ. In other words, our hermeneutical reflection must itself be an instance of "working out our own salvation in fear and trembling, because God is at work in us both to will and to act according to his good purpose" (Phil 2:12-13). "

Jammin'

Winter Retreat is coming up. [It won't be winter but that's okay.] Was scheduled to start a new SS series on Acts. Need to visit some people. And am teaching an entire gospel each Wednesday night. Things feel a little jammed together right now.
But I enjoyed teaching Matthew's gospel last night. The retreat stuff will come together because it will and it has to. I'll delay the Acts series until I'm ready. And the visits will happen because people are important. So with all this activity, what could be better?
Well, I need to be careful with my family. I could be absorbed by the job/ministry stuff and let them drift away. We had a good night at The Whiting Tuesday night and really enjoyed the Wizard of Oz. It was definitely more captivating and more fun than Annie. The busyness could be fun but it'll be worthless and shameful if I let the family go kapoot.
I'm reminded of 1 Timothy 5:8 "If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever." Although the immediate context is speaking to material matters, there's plenty of biblical weight to apply this to spiritual matters as well.
God, I need help to not be a slacker in providing for my family. Don't let me be materially or spiritually cheap with them.